Thursday, November 5, 2015

Einstein -- The Original Purveyor of BS

I seem to have replaced my old bedtime routine (falling asleep watching Friends) with a new involuntary practice of rethinking every single thought, word, decision, and action that comprised my day.

Every. Single. One.

Kind of makes me long for six whiny, self-absorbed, 20-something New Yorkers in my ear instead.

As of yet, it hasn’t caused me to lose much sleep. The physical exhaustion which has resulted from all of my running overcomes my brains attempts at restless anxiety or insomnia. But in the silence, stillness (which is still absent from my day because I putter and fidget a lot), and complete darkness of my bedroom there is nothing to distract from the musings of my mind. They’re not necessarily profound thoughts, but they are plentiful, disorganized, and, on occasion, alarming. They swirl around in my head so that they almost make me feel physically dizzy and then right as I think I’m going to puke or have a panic attack, I manage to hone in on one specific memory from the day and then I drift off to sleep pondering it. This whole process takes mere minutes, though it feels longer and can be intense. And when I wake up the following morning, I can’t remember what ended up in focus.

Until this morning.

Full disclosure: I wanted to remember it this morning because coupled with whatever thought it was that calmed last evening’s brainstorm, was an urgent need to write about it. That was a very inconvenient time to have that particular need. There was no notebook and pencil by my bed…no recording device…and a realization that if I got out of bed to retrieve either item, I might be forced to endure another swirling thought vortex. Instead I chose to stay put and hope that I could remember the next day. And with some effort I did.

This was the thought…

I have no tangible, saleable skills…no training in a trade or specific profession…that are of value in the American job market.

Ok...so..sweet dreams.

I have talents. I have a bachelor’s degree. I have job experience that is 1 inch deep and 1 mile wide through which I developed my abilities to work independently and in groups, to speak in public, to write persuasively, and to listen fastidiously. I have also cultivated some clerical skills that have served me well in volunteer positions and make me appear extremely capable and organized. On a higher level, I have learned the value of listening to a variety of viewpoints and considering their merits before establishing my own position…of identifying who the key players are in a given situation and bringing them to the table when something needs to get done…of placing myself in the right place at the right time to achieve an organizational or personal goal.

Basically, I am a master of bullshit. And there is no category for it on my resume.

I should have gone to law school. Or learned how to build furniture. Both of these are occupations that I considered at one time or another. I also wanted to be a professional camp counselor – I have some mad small group leadership skills.

So now I’m 42 with a communications degree and resume that is about 16 years old. And I keep reading these articles about the value of a liberal arts education and how we shouldn’t forsake these age-old disciplines in our pursuit of STEM education.  But lately I’m just not feeling it and I suspect employers aren't either.

If only I knew how to code…or be an accountant…or design eco-friendly housing developments.  Now those are some valuable skills.
And then I go back to the word value. Just looking at the dictionary definitions (that’s plural) hints at the complexity of discerning what and who has value and how we assign it as a culture.
It is a noun and verb and for me it is LOADED with baggage.
1.       I can have values -- my ethical code or moral compass.
2.       I can deem something of value – a colleague’s support or a saleable item.
3.       I can estimate a thing’s value – appraise its monetary cost or worth as currency on its own.
4.       I can value – an action word – any number of things, ideas, or people. I value friendship, independence, family, good health…the list goes on and on.
I can also value myself – we call that self-esteem.
The tension among these definitions is great and I am thankful that they weren’t part of the equation as I focused in on my lack of valuable skills last night. I’m pretty sure I’d still be awake.
For myself, I am confident in my values – in my ethical code and in the integrity with which I live it. I also endeavor to be respectful of other’s moral stances even when they differ from my own. These are both things at which I am not perfect but aim to improve upon each day.
I make value judgements with respect to people and things every day. That person is a hard worker…that dishwasher is worthless…my view of this morning’s sunset was priceless.
I value good conversation with dear friends over wine and food. I value the opportunity to train for a marathon. I value the existence of music and art and scientific discovery and historical reflection and self-examination and I really value the existence of words to express it all. This expression is what generates ideas, resolves conflict, and brings order to chaos. I value all of this so much that I ache when the world – myself included – doesn’t always recognize the significance of these things. That they are often deemed worthless in terms of economic value.
How do we live in a world that is, by human design, determined to place a value on everything about us (our bodily usefulness, our intellect, our skills and talents, our possessions) and not transfer that label of worthiness (a price tag) to who we are as people?
How do we reserve the essence of our being – our humanity – but still find some satisfaction in a vocational calling or simply a job that pays the bills (hopefully)?
In short, how can my mastery at the art and science of BS earn me a steady paycheck?
Questions like this are the reason I write and the reason that this TV-less existence is both illuminating and terrifying. There is a metaphorical abyss in which all of my most profound contemplations as well as my most self-absorbed preoccupations reside. Through the center there runs a ridge at the top of which is a narrow footpath. I’m just trying to walk a straight line between the two as the contents of both sides creep upward, threaten to knock me off my feet, and wash me into one chasm or the other. I think the distraction of television can acted as an antacid of sorts…regulating the acidic bubbles that give buoyancy to all the thoughts that inhabit my brain.
I’m going to need to find something else to replace the inanity of House Hunters or the mindless sequence of a procedural drama. I’m really looking for something on the healthy end of the spectrum (think running and praying…not drugs and alcohol) to calm the waters. Otherwise I’m going to end up with insomnia.

Maybe I’ll just stick with the writing. Is there are a job market for writers who also happen to have a masters "degree" in BS? If there is, please send word. 
In the meantime, I will try follow Einstein's advice:

Until I figure out how to do both. 

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